Out with the old, in with the new: I’ve been warned that being a new mom could result in resentment, depression and a need to break free from the new responsibilities. BUT knowing myself I believe becoming a mom is just what the doctor ordered
I’ll admit it… My life before baby or before getting pregnant rather, wasn’t all that great. I’ve spent most of my 20’s searching; trying to figure out who I am, what I wanted to do, attempting to fit in and basically just wandering aimlessly and lost. Honestly I can not wait to leave that all behind.
Becoming a mom will give me a definite identity; an unmistakable role. If I know nothing else I know I will be Ari’s mommy!
I’ve heard many moms warn that once I become a mom I must make time for myself… That I may become resentful and want something more for my life, and its all totally normal. Don’t get me wrong these well-meaning woman just may be right, I will be the first to admit that BUT I’m not there yet.
Time alone, being able to run out of the house quickly and missing my career are the three top concerns I’ve been presented with. SO I’ll address each…
I have had nothing but time for myself for my entire life previous to becoming a wife and soon to be mom and really… I don’t like it. These past few weeks of being home alone waiting for DH to get home, trying to fill my time with being “productive” also known as cleaning, cooking, eating and sleeping has been killing me. I HATE BEING ALONE, but at the same time I don’t want to go out and do the whole social butterfly thing either.
Getting Out of the House Alone
I may have a touch of social anxiety and I also hate going places alone. I always prefer to wait for DH to come home before going to the grocery store or anywhere for that matter. I used to take our dog with me for walks in the park; not because he needed a walk or because I was being a kind doggy-step-mother, but so I could use him as a “distraction” if there was a fellow walker approaching . Then I wouldn’t have to make eye contact or smile, I’d just act as if I was preoccupied with the doggy. Sad… I know.
See — having baby Ari with me at all times will be a dream come true for ME! I’m sure it’s easier to zip off without having to think about packing a bag changing baby etc. but I’d take that any day over striking out in this harsh world alone 😉
So the point I’m trying to make is that I’m in need of and welcome a side-kick!
Missing My Career
I’ll admit I’ll miss my job. I actually wrote about being Scared to Leave. My job was no typical job, it was an extremely personal and fulfilling.
Other than that, I’m so excited! Out with the old in with the new! Good riddance . . . I know I know you’re thinking yeah right this chick has no clue … You maybe right but let me enjoy it while I can.